If you are not ready to be committed, don’t get married

KHC Camp-Meeting 2015 Registration closes by 12pm tomorrow!

The Johnson’s marriage is one that looks like a contradiction. The husband is good, handsome, and born again. The wife is beautiful and also a child of God. But they fight almost on a daily basis. The husband has anger problem and talks too much. The wife internalises a lot and has a problem of forgiving others.

It looked like a perfect scenario for the devil to access, the husband gets angry and abuses, the wife internalises and cannot forgive easily. How will they ever get anything done?

Their prayer lives were hindered, they fought each other, insisting on who is wrong and who is right and the devil kept plundering
their home!

Marriage is work. Marriage involves commitment. Marriage is often a destiny changer either for good or bad.

It all depends on your choice, and the extent or degree to which you have followed God in deciding who you settle down with. Sometimes, it is just the best thing to follow God all the way.

Now singles, hear this. After you have followed God, it doesn't mean that every problem is eliminated. There are still personality issues that must be dealt with.

There are adjustments to make. There is practical forgiveness and choosing to be joyful decisions that must be made.

In loving a person, it often starts with feelings. You must have experienced a lot of that after you fall in love with a person. It’s more of feelings and it is okay. But after sometimes, the feelings actually subsides, and then you are confronted with reality.

Do you know a lot of people often break up at this point? They just say something like, I cannot feel anything again.

Whoever says you will feel something everyday of your life?

Can I tell you the truth? There are a few times I wish I were single for a few days. Such times, I wanted to disappear from home, and just be alone.It doesn't mean I don't like my wife and boys, it only means, I don’t feel anything at such times.

Does my feeling change my conviction?

No!

Listen to me, you will not always feel “something” for your spouse after marriage. You will wake up some mornings and there wouldn't be a drop of feeling!

That does not mean God has departed from your marriage, it only means you are not supposed to live and be regulated by your feelings alone in the first place.

Marriage is deeper than feelings, more of a conviction, more of a covenant, more of a decision.

This part of conviction and covenant perspective is what a lot of people lack and they want to divorce at any slight provocation.

Thus, as a single, behind the feelings and passion which will not always be there, do you really love that person? Is there a conviction?

Why is conviction necessary?

A lot of challenges come with life and with marriage. A lot of pressures come with raising a family. A lot of discovery of personality differences and weaknesses will take place. At such times, your feelings would have flown away like birds of the air. The only thing that will remain at such times is your conviction and your commitment.

Have you had a series of broken relationships? Could that be the reason? Always judging the temperature of a relationship by what you feel?

Feelings are fickle and unreliable. That is why you can have a crush on somebody this week and you are almost certain the person is your spouse until the following week and you discover you actually hate the person!

Amon had feelings for her step sister, Tamar. He could not eat again. He was disturbed. He eventually raped her and then all the feelings disappeared. He got what he wanted, it was just lust, never love in the first place.

When he begins to press for jeru trap, ask him what he wants, you or your body? If it is you then he should wait to have you, that is dignity. If it is your body, you can be sure if you offer him, your chances of being married just reduced, because he already got what he wanted. If he is offered something better in another lady, he would leave you alone. It is just logical.

Marriage is commitment. It involves a decision not to mess up your family and your future. Marriage never solves the problem of lust, that is why there is adultery.

Lust problem is a reflection of the state of the heart. Before you sin with your so called lover, remember that whoever sins with you will eventually sin against you!

But Pastor, he will leave me alone of I don't cooperate. Well, let him go, maybe his name is Abednego! The reality is that if the wrong person does not exit your life, you will not welcome the right person, because God will not allow you to double date!

Don’t suspend your life wishing somebody will change. You will never be able to change anybody, and God has not called you to change anybody, when you haven’t finished changing yourself.

You may not be able to see a perfect person, but be led of God. God knows the best for you. There should be that fundamental fear of God in the person of your choice, for that would determine a lot, your direction in life after marriage, your productivity, your ministry, your career, your fulfillment and more.

Finally, be truthful to yourself. Could you be bringing a self inflicted delay on yourself by fraternising with married people in adulterous adventures? You cannot be sleeping with a married person and then be praying that God should answer you speedily. How? You cannot be daily having jeru trap with several people while you are praying and fasting that God should answer you quickly. How? In my few years of counseling several people, those are some of the contradictions I have seen in the body of Christ. Listen to me, dear child of God, habitual sinful life lead son where. Going to the mountain regularly does not solve that problem, it is a confronting yourself ,and tidying up your destiny that does the job.

As KHC Camp Meeting approaches, I know that God is going to correct errors in several lives. You will yet shine and mount up with wings as eagle.

I pray for you this morning, you will not miss it. I pray for couples, God will give you wisdom to live in your home.

Marriage is work, but there is grace for it. The work even becomes easier when you follow God’s word and instructions in relating with each other.

For example, the scripture says husband should honour their wives as physically the weaker.That means you should never raise your hands against her! Or else your prayers will not be answered!

Then it says to wives, honour him , prize him, and do to him all that reverence includes.

Following God’s word and not your flesh brings a lot of refreshing into your relationship or marriage. May God help us all.

KHC Camp-Meeting is 3 Days Away! You can support the meeting with your seed. Go HERE.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am helped of God. God is my strength and direction.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, let your will be done in my life

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
In the same way you married men should live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation], honoring the woman as [physically] the weaker, but [realizing that you] are joint heirs of the grace (God's unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered and cut off. [Otherwise you cannot pray effectively.]

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Camp-Meeting 2015 with Victor Adeyemi, Albert Oduwole, Elekima Ekine, Adefunke Ekine, Francis Madojemu, Dunamis & Sophia Okunowo. For Inquiries,
Call Mr. Oba on 08069751456

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 
Matthew 12:22-50; Luke 11